Caring for a loved one can involve navigating a complex medical system, and effective communication with healthcare professionals is vital, especially if you are their primary advocate. The role you play in their life requires a clear understanding of medical conditions and medications.
While it may feel overwhelming, when approached with preparation and the right strategies, you can ensure that you, your loved one, the doctor or staff at a long-term living facility are all on the same page.
Here are actionable tips to help you effectively communicate and advocate for your loved one while fostering a collaborative relationship with their healthcare team.
1. Prepare in Advance
Before medical appointments or consultations, gather all relevant medical information. We recommend keeping it a binder reducing the chances of lost or loose paper, but also so that others, who may be involved with caring for your loved one, can also locate their key information.
This includes:
Medical History: A list of diagnoses, family history, past surgeries, allergies, and ongoing treatments.
Medication List: Include all prescribed and over-the-counter medications, along with dosages and schedules.
Questions and Concerns: Write down a list of questions and prioritize them to ensure the most critical issues are addressed. While it’s important for your loved one to talk to the doctor, it’s important that you are there to help fill in some of the blanks in case they forget to mention something they told you. Take your time in the appointment and make sure that you feel heard, and your questions are answered.
Avoid the Internet: It’s okay if you want to research symptoms or see if there are side effects of medications online, but with so much information out there, it’s easy to let one small thing lead to a big one. Try to stop diagnosing via the Internet. It has a lot of information but not a M.D. or real-life practice. Take your concerns to the doctor and let them be the M.D.
Preparation not only ensures you don’t forget important details but also signals to healthcare professionals that you take your role seriously. It will also ensure that if you need to relay information to others, that you have everything you need to do so.
2. Keep Communication Clear and Concise
Today’s doctors and healthcare professionals are, sadly, often pressed for time, so clear and concise communication is essential. Again, preparation will help make sure that the appointment goes well and is thorough.
Be Specific: Instead of saying, “They [She/He] don’t seem well,” try, “They’ve been experiencing fatigue and shortness of breath for the past three days.”
Avoid Medical Jargon, You Saw Online: Use simple language to describe symptoms or concerns and allow the professional to help put together the pieces, make recommendations and talk with you about what it may, or may not, be, if anything.
Summarize Key Points: At the end of the discussion, summarize the main takeaways to confirm understanding and to make certain that you understand medicines, or new medicines, exercises, next steps such as making an appointment with a specialist, or anything else important.
3. Build a Collaborative Relationship
The best relationships with physicians and healthcare professionals, in general, is one that is collaborative. Remember, you are both working towards the same goal – the health and well-being of your loved one. Respect and collaboration are the cornerstones of effective communication, especially here.
Acknowledge Expertise: Respect the healthcare professional’s expertise, as well as their knowledge of and relationship with your loved one, and express appreciation for their efforts.
Voice Your Perspective: Share your observations and insights as the person who knows your loved one best but remains open to their responses.
Ask Questions: Don’t hesitate to seek clarification on unfamiliar terms or treatment plans. Ask “what if then” or “what does this mean” questions, if warranted, and ultimately make sure that you are crystal clear on what the doctor is recommending. If anything feels uncertain in your mind, ask.
5. Advocate for Your Loved One
As a caregiver, you are your loved one’s advocate. Speak up if something seems amiss, if you feel they aren’t being heard, or their needs aren’t being met. However, refrain from being accusatory. Maintain a tone of collaboration rather than confrontation. As they say, “you get more bees with honey than vinegar”.
Language, words and delivery all matter in communicating with someone else and you will find your doctor or healthcare professional much more receptive when you’re respectful and inquisitive.
Use “I” Statements: Say, “I’m concerned about the side effects of this medication,” instead of, “You prescribed the wrong medicine.”
Seek Second Opinions: If you’re unsure about a diagnosis or treatment, don’t hesitate to seek another perspective. Your doctor will not mind. Sometimes people need to hear the same thing from others to confirm a decision, or to investigate options to help make the right decision for them.
6. Leverage Technology
Technology can bridge gaps in communication, especially in today’s telehealth era. It’s beautiful and saves time leaving messages or remaining on hold until someone can respond to you.
Use Patient Portals: Many healthcare systems offer online portals for scheduling, messaging providers, and accessing medical records. Why it’s great: any questions you have after the appointment you can simply send in and they will respond as soon as they have time. Be thorough in your question to reduce the back and forth and improve getting the correct answer right away.
Telehealth Appointments: Take advantage of virtual consultations when in-person visits are challenging. Why it’s great: if your loved one is not feeling well, immobile or unable to leave the bed, it guarantees that you will not miss the appointment.
Organize Information Digitally: Apps designed for caregiving can help you manage appointments, reminders, and medical information.
7. Know When to Escalate
In the case of a loved one in a skilled nursing or long-term care facility, if you feel that communication is breaking down or you feel your loved one’s needs are not being met, it’s important to escalate the issue. But do so strategically and with thoughtfulness – remember the bee analogy.
Write out your concerns for yourself. Sometimes, when we’re flustered, we can forget certain details.
Request a meeting with a supervisor, patient advocate, or case manager noting that you have concerns that need to be resolved.
Be calm and clear in your communications and ask questions. There are two sides to every story and while you may trust your loved one over facility employees, it’s always seen as more fair when you listen and then offer feedback or answers.
If you do not feel that they are being genuine or dismissing your concerns, then it is time to take it up the ladder until you feel confident that it will be resolved and not happen again.
Remember to always start with respect and let them keep it or let it go.
Conclusion
Effective communication with healthcare professionals is a critical skill for family caregivers who play the role of not only caregiver but also medical advocate, and even personal health manager.
By preparing thoroughly, speaking clearly, advocating respectfully, and leveraging available resources, you can ensure your loved one receives the best possible care, feels heard and gets every question answered.
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